Hello, everyone, it’s time for another blog post! After I began the weight-loss blog last winter, I lost about 30 lbs. (yay)! There was something about being honest and public about my experiences that helped set in motion the release of the weight.
As I set off on a new journey, I’m prepared to open up once again. The prospect of sharing these experiences terrifies me down to my little toes (which are blue right now by the way :), so I know this sharing is a good thing. I will be speaking about artistic, spiritual, and psychological matters–tender subjects–areas of great insight as well as vulnerability. With all that said, I request your kindness as I travel this journey with you. It is a personal story, as I know your own stories are personal and unique to you.
I leave for Europe tomorrow to continue the delicious sage of using my voice. What a gift it is to sing opera! I love it with every fiber of my being! I express the feelings of women like Tosca (current fav!), Lady Macbeth, and Aida–women of high drama, vulnerability, and passion (remind you of anyone?). When I rehearse, coach, and perform this music, I feel present and alive. I use every part of myself to do this–emotional, physical, intellectual, energetic, musical, cosmic, etc.
Furthermore, I quake in my boots when I think too much about what I’m doing, when I worry about my flaws and everything yet to accomplish. Can I do it? Will the giant risks I’m taking pay off? Am I good enough???
The question I do know the answer to is that it’s time. It’s time to risk, to move out of my home and stay with friends in order to be mobile, to explore alternate views of what home means to me, to explore performing options in Europe and around North America.
It’s time to be loyal to my voice. Yes, it’s full of uncertainty. I could write a list of the emotional, spiritual, and financial healing happening right now. Some days I only have the energy to sit on the couch. But most days, I wake up and recognize that I’m living my life, and it’s exciting to get out bed. Is it worth it? Is it worth it to trust on such a grand scale, to take responsibility for my heart’s calling, to believe that my deepest heart’s gladness is also my personal path of bringing healing to this world?
Yes. Yes, with all my heart and soul. Yes, yes yes!!
What is your heart’s gladness? What do you long to say “yes” to?